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episode-2

What’s For Dinner

Kimberly: Some people call 'em rants, others call 'em meltdowns. But to me, they're just plain old hissy fits and if you're having them, they're costing you big time. I'm Kimberly Gosney Life Coach. And welcome to the Hissy Fits Podcast. Every week I serve up a hissy fit that was thrown by me or a member of my audience. I share how the hissy fit makes you feel, how much time or money the hissy fit is costing you, and what wonderful thing you could have been doing instead. It ain't pretty when you're throwing a hissy fit. And just because I'm a life coach doesn't mean I've got my shit together. If you've ever wasted an entire weekend, raging about something so freaking ridiculous that you wished you had all that time back - buckle up because we're about to get hissy.

Kimberly: Heads' up. If you're a mom like me and you love listening to podcast episodes with your kiddos around this episode is 100% not kiddo friendly. I'm using some pretty naughty words. So I just wanted to let you know, in case you need to pause and come back to this episode later. Today's episode of the Hissy Fits Podcast is brought to you by everyone that lives in my freaking house. This is Episode 2 What's For Dinner. OMG y'all. We're about to dig into one of the biggest time sucks in my daily life. What's for dinner! Insert rage and furious anger. Whenever anyone in my house asks me what's for dinner. Yep. I've been coached on this and it's definitely not one of my proudest moments, but I'm willing to embarrass myself because I think this hissy fit is happening in homes all across America.

Kimberly: Women are tired as fuck y'all, there I said it. Tired of being the doers of all the things in our homes while working and while being stretched thinner than ever thanks to COVID. After months of being asked daily what's for dinner and cooking more than ever before this sparks way less than joy in your body the moment someone in your household asks you for the millionth time - What's for dinner? As I set the stage for this week's hissy fit, I just want to share that this past week was not the normal week in the life of the Gosney household. My hubby was off last week. He was on vacation from work and my daughter is in school from home and she is trying to read the Scarlet letter and she's put off reading the book until the very last minute.

Kimberly: And she's got a test on it on this coming Monday. So it's like no surprise that this week is like a giant crazed F bomb exploding all over the place in my house, sprinkle in a couple of barking dogs. And it's the perfect hissy fit storm. And there's all kinds of emotions brewing in my household this week. What's for dinner is last question I ever want to be asked on the entire freaking planet. So now we've dug into a little bit about the hissy fit itself. Now we're going to ask ourselves three questions about the hissy fit. These questions are always the same, and I want you to go through this with me if you are in the bucket of people who are tired of being asked what's for dinner every single day of your life. So let's go ahead and start with question number one. How does this hissy fit feel in your body?

Kimberly: So I can't even stop laughing because this is so ridiculous, but I'm gonna tell you how it feels in my body. When someone asks me what's for dinner and sorry, I'm laughing because it is very funny how ridiculous I am. Okay. So in my body it feels like someone should just magically bring me dinner. It should be the perfect temperature. It should already be cooked and it should be on my front porch. Someone rings my doorbell at 7:30 and my dinner is just there waiting for me on my front porch. I don't have to figure out what it is. I love it. It tastes great. I don't have to cook it and I don't have to plan for it. And I don't have to do anything but open my front door and food just magically appears. So this is so ridiculous because that is not how it is in most American families, right?

Kimberly: Someone either has to get the dinner or someone has to cook the dinner or someone has to prepare in advance for the dinner. And that's why to me, this is just hysterical because like, seriously, we have food in our house that we can eat. And right now it is such a crazy time in the world. And there are always people who do not have enough. And so for me to just think that my food should magically show up prepared and ready for me to dig in is just so ridiculous, but still that's how it feels in my body. Like the food should just be magically showing up as if it is like unicorn dinners landing on my front porch. So if that's you and you create unicorn dinners and put them on people's front porches and you live in Clayton, North Carolina, feel free, drop some meals off by my front porch.

Kimberly: That's how it feels in my body. But that's the surface feeling. That's just the top level of the feeling. Really. If I dig in super deep underneath the layers and the years of dinners, here's what comes up for me. And it's a repeating pattern. June Cleaver comes up for me. For those of you who don't know June Cleaver, she's the perfect mom from like the forties or fifties from Leave it to Beaver. And June Cleaver wears her pearls. She wore a dress every day. She vacuumed and took care of the family and made amazing dinners. Now I haven't watched Leave it to Beaver in a really long time, but in my mind, I imagine that her dresses are always the most lovely shade of teal blue. And she's always cooking roast beef, mashed potatoes and gravy, and she has corn.

Kimberly: I have no clue what she really cooked, but in my mind, it is the image that June Cleaver portrays the perfect woman who cooks the perfect meals and has her perfect husband and her perfect life living in her perfect house. And I am far from that vision in my head. So I am the exact opposite of June Cleaver. Most days I'm wearing my leggings and I have on an old T-shirt that probably has a few holes in it. I may or may not have washed my hair today. So to me, it's the exact opposite of who I am is June Cleaver. So June Cleaver is the perfect housewife, the perfect woman taking care of the perfect things. So this goes really deep y'all and you have feelings right now around what you should be doing as a woman in your household in the year 2020.

Kimberly: And you know what people say about shoulds it's like, why are you shoulding on yourself all day long? It's very true because June Cleaver and her life in those TV shows all those years ago is not exactly the same kind of life that women and have today. And if you do live the life that June Cleaver had, I am sure that 50% of the time your dinners are amazing and everything is perfect, but I'm sure there's 50% of the time that everything is all a hot mess behind the scenes for your life, as well as mine. It's a 50/50 split. So in my body, it feels like the feeling of inadequacy. Like I'm not living up to what the perfect mom does in America based on something that happened decades ago. All right now it is time for question number two, how much time or money does this hissy fit cost you?

Kimberly: Okay, so this one is definitely a time suck for me inside my home. And I'm not sure about you. So if you have this problem every night with what's for dinner, and you're going through this right now with me, how much time or money does this has hissy fit cost you? So I'm going to break it down, how much it costs me. So usually where this hissy fit starts is around 4:30 in the afternoon for me. I am not cooking dinner or eating dinner at 4:30. We don't eat until around 7:30 or 8:00 on most nights lately. That's a span of 3 hours every day, where I'm already thinking about dinner at 4:30, my husband may call me between 5 and 6. We may or may not have a little discussion, kinda heated about what's for dinner.

Kimberly: And then between 7:30 and 8, we may be actually eating. So I'm going to say it's around 3 hours that the hissy fit swirls, and I'm not in the hissy fit the whole 3 hours. Y'all it's on my mind. It's kind of being my day. It's kind of like in my head. And that's just about how long I spend with this one every day. So 3 hours every day, y'all like, seriously, that's ridiculous. So ridiculous that I'm spending 3 hours, like all caught up in the swirl of the hissy bit around what's for dinner. I'm not even eating the dinner at that time. Like I don't even eat, until 7:30 or 8. So 3 hours every day, that is how much time this particular hissy fit is costing me. And now it's time for the third and final question about this hissy fit.

Kimberly: What amazing thing could you have been doing instead of having this hissy fit? Oh my gosh it's is like a part time job, and it's super funny to me right now, as I say that - that's exactly what I said last week. In the first episode about how I spent 14 hours a week upset about not having a fence. So this week it is a whole lot of time spent about what's for dinner, 21 hours part time, job territory y'all. So instead of throwing hissy fits this week over what's for dinner, I could be using my Instapot and setting up dinner during my lunch break or work it into the dinner schedule. I made up three weeks ago with alternating what's for dinner days with me and my hubby. And this is super embarrassing. Y'all by the way, my hubby has stuck to the schedule. He has honored the system, me not so much. And finally, I could be watching some episodes of Leave it to Beaver with my 47 year old eyes. I'm betting, I'll see all kinds of things that I feel differently about today than I did as a little kid.

Kimberly: And I can promise you that this week I won't be having any hissy fits over what's for dinner y'all and that's my sassy solution to this week's hissy fit. And I can even wear pearls when I'm eating my dinner, if I feel like it. Here's an interesting fact about June Cleaver, as I was doing research, putting together this week's hissy fits podcast episode, I Googled why does June Cleaver wear pearls? And, Oh my gosh, y'all she wears pearls because she has a scar on her neck. So she is hiding a scar by wearing her pearls. So what things look like on the outside are not always as they appear to be y'all. So keep that in mind this week, as you are working through your hissy fits, thank you so much for joining me for this week's episode of the hissy fits podcast. I'm Kimberly Gosney and I approved this hissy fit.

Kimberly: Are frequent hissy fits, ruining your evenings squabbling with your spouse about what's for dinner. When you could be relaxing with a nice hot bubble bath, join the freakin' club. If you're feeling hissy about something, call the Hissy Fits Hotline at (919) 289-5995. Share your latest hissy hit, and you may be featured on an upcoming episode of the Hissy Fits Podcast.

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